Cozy Vibes Don’t Change What’s Best for YouWith a frighteningly high number of new COVID-19 cases in the United States every day, and the lingering uncertainty of turbulent political times, the itch for touch may be even more real this snuggle season. Many of us have endured months of increased social isolation, and if we’re not already partnered, the prospect of more cold months without a snuggle buddy can feel overwhelming. At the same time, it may not be possible or wise for you to rush into a relationship just because it’s snuggle season. You may be single because you’re waiting to meet the right person for a long term relationship, because sexual intimacy isn’t a healthy choice for you right now, because you need to practice increased coronavirus precautions, or because you simply haven’t met anyone you’re attracted to. Rushing into a physical relationship when you know it’s not right for you, or with someone you don’t feel safe or comfortable with, may not ultimately give you the comfort you need. And if you’re happily single, you deserve to celebrate that as an affirmative, sexy choice. Here are six ideas for some sexy self-love if you’re single this snuggle season.
Go to Orgasm SchoolOrgasm is not a competition (unless you’re into that), and sex —both solo and partnered—can still be pleasurable without it. But it’s always fun to up your capacity to experience pleasure, and discover new ways to get off.
The pull of snuggle season is looking for someone to keep you warm in bed on a lazy afternoon—but you can indulge in an epic snugglefest yourself.Enter digital sex school. The move to video chat-everything has inspired a wave of innovative online courses, workshops, and classes designed to bring out your sensual side. If you’ve got 50 bucks and a couple of hours to spare, you can sign up for a virtual session to practice breath and energetic orgasm, learn the secret to squirting, or simply break down the barriers to accepting and loving your body.
Plan The Ultimate Snuggle SeshThis should be a full-on cozy staycation. Part of the pull of snuggle season is looking for someone to keep you warm in bed on a lazy afternoon when it’s snowing outside—but you can indulge in that kind of epic snugglefest yourself. Clear your calendar for the day, because snuggling is serious business. Then build a pillow fort on your bedroom floor, or make your bed with fresh, crisp sheets and your softest comforter, spritzed with a favorite scent. Splurge on a new pillow—a really soft one. Take a luxurious bath or shower, put on your glammest lingerie or your coziest sweatpants or go au naturel—and have at it. A scented candle, something sweet to eat, and some help from your favorite liquid or herbal intoxicant (if that’s a good choice for you) can only help. Takeout or your favorite Bake Off-inspired homemade comfort food? Don’t mind if I do! As for what activities you get up to in your Yoko Ono-level day in bed, that’s totally up to you. Just remember: Netflix and chill is also stimulating while solo.
Have a Naughty Dinner PartyYes, that is a euphemism for masturbating with vegetables. You heard me right: While we often think of incorporating food play in partnered sex, it can also be a safe, sexy, and dare I say tasty way to add some spice (not literally—that stuff burns) to your self-love routine. When combing your kitchen for your next masturbation tool, follow some basic body safety. Pretty much anything you’re willing to clean up can lead to sexy play on your upper body and legs: whipped cream, champagne, strawberries, juicy melon, warm oil, can all be great for solo sensation play. When it comes to your genitals, be a little more selective. Keep anything oily or sugary away; both can encourage the growth of bacteria, and a foodplay related yeast infection is not the vibe. (According to some gynecologists, coconut oil is a slippery exception to this rule; test some on your skin first to make sure it agrees with you.) Spicy, hot, or acidic foods are also not the move, as they are potentially irritating, which you’ll know if you’ve ever experienced the classic “forgot I cut hot peppers earlier today and masturbated” sting. Neither are yeasty or crumbly ones (sorry, baguette lovers).
It’s called “skin hunger”: If you have found yourself feeling isolated while socially distancing, it may be that you crave touch.Instead, for genital play, opt for longer, harder foods that you can wash and that are likely to remain intact if inserted. Cucumbers are classic for a reason; so are carrots and zucchini. Rinse them off and use a condom if you’re going to insert the food to avoid infection—and have fun.